Given how incredibly gay Metal Gear Rising was, it's a wonder Jack managed to get Rosemary pregnant at all.
Given how incredibly dim Jack is, it's a wonder he even figured out how to.
(These random thoughts brought to you by Far Cry 5, which is good but I'm dying too frequently — while running away from a bloke in a car while two others shot me and a mountain lion tried [and likely succeeded] to eat me, at one point — and the perennial yearning to play MGR again. It's now backwards compatible on Xbox One, but 45-hour work weeks and the fact I can't prise my mother off the console mean I'm limited to the console right next to my work laptop instead. Hence FC5. But fuck I miss MGR.)